Semester One of Graduate School

Since I've been on such a hiatus, I'm going to start from the most recent things and try to work my way back.

When I came home, I enrolled at Lipscomb University to start my Masters of Education. My first class was called Principles of Learning. I basically learned how people learn. It was really interesting, and ended up coming out of that class with a 100. I couldn't believe that I was in a Masters class and received a 100 percent.

My second class was called planning, instruction, and assessment. That is pretty self-explanatory. I wrote lots of lesson plans and learned a whole lot about assessing how students learned. I have gained so much knowledge, and I'm happy to report that I am a lesson plan writing fool! I had to write a 5 lesson plan unit plan, and decided on an 8th grade unit over The Tell Tale Heart by Edgar Allan Poe. I had a really great time writing it, and ended up getting a perfect score on it!

Overall, I got an A in both of those classes, so I got my first 4.0! I'm looking forward to my next classes that start in January.

When I started my Masters program, I wanted to teach 7-12 English. I still do, but I have decided to get certified in two subjects... English 7-12 and Math 7-12. I know, I know... who does English AND Math? Well, this girl does! I start taking some refresher Math courses in January along with my basic Masters classes. I'm going to be a busy girl!

In addition to taking Masters classes, I have been tutoring at Davidson, which is where I went to high school. I subbed there every now and then, but just the other day, they offered me a full-time job for next semester! I'll be watching study halls all day, which sounds totally boring, but it will give me a chance to connect with kids. I'll still be tutoring, but I have a more permanent position.

I think what I am most excited about is just connecting with students and hanging out with them and allowing God to work in me in that capacity.

I've been going through a bit of a tough season, but the Lord is faithful and has been putting amazing people in my life to lift my spirits and remind me of my purpose here in Nashville.

Here's a sneak preview of some posts that are in the works...

• Me and my roomie, Michelle, took a road trip to Texas
• I went to 48395239 concerts this Summer, including a few of a close friend
• My sweet Melissa passed away in September, and I haven't been able to write a post about it
• Awesome things that are happening in the life of my church, Hope Fellowship

That is just a few things that I'm thinking about, but I promise to try to stay on top of my blogging.

K

To Blog or Not To Blog

I have been debating on whether or not I want to keep blogging. I have taken a MAJOR hiatus, but I have finally decided that I am going to keep blogging. My life has taken so many twists and turns since I returned from Haiti, and I want to be able to document and share with you the many changes that I am going through.

But I'm not going to start blogging until tomorrow. I want to do a "catch up" post and let you know about some really exciting things in my life and the life of my best friends. Stay tuned!

K

It's Been A While

Hey friends!

It's been quite a while since I last blogged. I wish that I could put in to writing the emotions I have felt lately. I have had good feelings and sad feelings, angry feelings and everything in between. I'm going to try to recap the summer, but mostly through pictures since that is less boring :)

I got home after a LONG day of travel and immediately went to Steak and Shake with my 7 friends that came with me to the airport. This picture is gross, but it's the only one we took that night.

I finally got reunited with the Tripod!



A few days after I got home, my cousins, aunt, uncle, and grandma came for a Nashville visit!

I met a famous guy...

I was a date to a wedding.

Then there was camp. I really want to devote a whole blog to the awesomeness of camp, but this one little picture can show you just how ridiculous it is.

After camp, we headed downtown for the fireworks and a pretty sweet Darius Rucker concert.

After that, I headed up to Pigeon Forge with my roomie to see this guy. I just love Georgey.


That really sums up a lot of the summer. I've been hanging out with lots of people and just readjusting to life. I got in to grad school at Lipscomb University and I start on August 22. I will be getting my Masters of Education in instructional practice. I am super excited about the possibilities once I have my Masters.

I've been applying for jobs left and right, but not having much luck. I'm hoping to have something nailed down in the next week, and actually just got word of an interview on Friday. Yay!

Not a day goes by that I don't think about Haiti. My heart aches all the time. The past few days have been especially hard. I keep seeing pictures of Melissa and Junior, and many other children who touched my life. I miss giving them hugs and loving them. I miss my students. I'm around high schoolers pretty much every day, but I miss the bond that I shared with the students at QCS. I didn't think it would be this hard, but wow. I just want to teleport back there. My life here seems so meaningless. I'm not really doing anything to change the world like I said I would.

There are so many opportunities at my feet, yet I'm terrified to take them. I'm scared to put myself out there and love like I loved in Haiti. I hate this feeling, and I know it is one that only God can cure. So I'm going to pray. I'm going to pray that I love without abandon. I'm going to pray for every person in Haiti that I came in contact with. I'm going to pray for the people I'm around here in Tennessee. I'm going to step up and be the woman of God that I know I am supposed to be.

Sorry for that little rant, I just needed to get it out. I'm going to TRY to blog more regularly, but my life is still pretty boring right now :)

America!

I am back in America! Nashville, to be exact. I haven't really had time to blog because life has been go, go, go. I wanted to give a quick update just to let you know how I'm doing.

After stressing out about who was going to pick me up at the airport, I was surprised by 8 lovely friends who welcomed me with open arms. We went to Steak and Shake where I had an amazing bacon cheeseburger!

Monday I went to meet my niece, Kailee. She is super cute, but the girl cried the entire time I was there. I'm convinced she doesn't like me very much. After visiting for a while, I went to surprise my friend Katie at the airport. She had just flown in from Bulgaria. I wanted to show my support, so we visited, then went to Hard Rock Cafe for dinner. After dinner, being the cheesy girl I am, I visited my friend Kellye and watched the Bachelorette. I do love that show!

Tuesday night I went over to a house and met up with my best friend from high school, Aubrey. I am in her wedding in October, so she introduced me to all of the bridesmaids. It was so fun just to meet everyone and finally be able to be part of the wedding.

Wednesday was best friend Adam's 27th birthday! We went to Chili's for lunch and helped him celebrate the day. After lunch, I went to an animal shelter with two other friends and played with puppies. That night was Bible study, which was a great time of worship.

I have been super busy with everyone, so today is my first day to just sit by myself. A couple of people have asked me how I have been dealing with being back. I honestly haven't even had time to think about it. It has been challenging trying to process all of my thoughts. I miss Haiti so much, but I'm having so much fun visiting all of my friends. I haven't really been able to talk about it much, which makes it challenging to process all of the things going on in my brain.

So once I figure out how I'm dealing with all this, I'll let you know :)

I Don't Like This One Bit

I've been avoiding blogging because I'm not quite ready to leave. After not being able to cry for the past two months, I have been a blubbering idiot these past few days.

Sunday, I said goodbye to my church family.



Today, I say goodbye to one of my closest friends, Heidi, and a couple of my students.




Tomorrow, I say goodbye to all of my students and another close friend, Katie.




Thursday, another friend, Jaime, leaves.



Saturday is graduation, where I'll see the seniors for the last time.

Algebra one sophomores!

10th Grade Boys

American Lit Juniors

10th Grade Girls

Sunday, I fly out.

I don't feel ready to go. My heart aches each time I have to say goodbye. Last week during class, we had a pretty relaxing week of review and just hanging out. I wrote every single one of my students a letter telling them how special they are to me and how much I will miss them. They all really appreciated it, but no one really said anything until I got to my Junior class.

One of the kids wanted me to go around and say one thing that I have loved about each student. That is so easy. I could do that all day long. After I finished going through the twelve of them, they started saying things to me. I was definitely not expecting it at all.

The things they said to me are marked in my heart forever. I have often wondering if I have even impacted one student while I've been here, and they definitely showed me that I did. God moved mountains in my life, and I'm so glad they were able to see Him moving in my life.

A lot of the boys in the class started out by apologizing for being so bad and rude. In the past few weeks, they were on a roll of bad behavior, so it was nice to hear them apologize. Many of them said they really respected me for leaving my comfortable life and coming here, even if it wasn't what my parents wished.

Cue watery eyes.

They were being so sentimental. There goal was to get me to cry, and I was trying to hold back. I didn't want them to see me break down, and I didn't want it to be goodbye. I held strong through four of five of their comments, but then one girl started. She is in my discipleship group, but has been fairly quiet throughout the year. She is a fantastic writer, but told me that she had quit writing because she didn't see it taking her anywhere. She told me that even though I never said keep it up, keep going, that she was motivated to continue writing because of me.

Cue more watery eyes.

She said that she saw Christ working in my life, and I didn't have to say keep going, and keep it up because she saw that I just up and left my parents and my life to come and work here. She said that I inspired her to keep working hard.

Cue tears flowing down my face.

I definitely didn't expect to hear that. It is incredible how God has moved this semester. He deserves every ounce of glory for the things that have happened this semester. All I have done is try to be obedient to His calling, and I'm glad that He is getting glory from this experience. I'm so sad to leave, but knowing that God has used my time here to glorify Him, I am pleased.

Even though I'm sad about leaving, I'm also really excited to go home and see my friends! These are just a few of them...

My new roomie!

Sweet Maci, and the rest of her family

College friends, Amanda and J
Work friend/BFF Jessie

John Mark!
Best friend, Kellye

The Tripod, of course

Hopefully a reunion will be in the works!

The other day, while I was avoiding grading, I made a list of some of the things I want to do this summer. Most of them are Nashville faves, but they are all things I want to do. I thought I would share with you so you can either reminiscence if you've done these things, put them on your wish list, or make fun of me for being absolutely ridiculous.

1. CMA Festival - I've got tickets to go and I'm so excited! Jaime and my other friend Amy are coming down for it.
2. Play in the fountains - one of my favorite past times.
3. Laser Quest
4. Mike's ice cream - birthday cake milkshake. Yes, please.
5. Margaritaville - they have some dang good nachos.
6. Wildhorse - a little country line dancin'
7. Play at Centennial - preferably the game, signs.
8. Go fishing
9. Go swimming - hopefully lots
10. Eat s'mores
11. Cook a meal for friends
12. Read a book - hopefully lots more than just one.
13. Donate clothes
14. Make a budget - it's time to be a big girl
15. Learn to ride a bike - I still don't know how
16. Have an "around the world" party - I'm big into cultural food. I'll bring the rice and beans!
17. Have a picnic
18. Pancake Pantry - one of my Nashville favorites
19. Eat a popsicle at Las Paletas
20. Gigi's Cupcakes
21. Arrignton Vineyard - a wine tasting could be fun and sophisticated
22. Shoot off fireworks
23. Eat at mellow mushroom
24. Volunteer somewhere
25. Smokies Game!

I know there is a ton more that I want to do, I just haven't been able to put it on paper yet. I'm hoping for one incredible summer, but I never want to forget the things I have learned and experienced here in Haiti. The goodbyes are sad, but God has truly blessed every ounce of my time here.

If you see me in the airport crying, don't be alarmed, I just miss my home.

One Haiti Dilemma

"Give me one dollar!" "Give me!" Whenever we walk down the street to our favorite little grocery store or the "faster food" restaurant close to us, these phrases ring out in the streets. Those two, along with my personal favorite, "blan!" (Blan means "white" in Creole) My first reaction is to scoop up these small kids and empty my pockets and do anything I can to give them something. What I didn't realize was that in my compassion, I could really be hurting them further. "But how can giving a small kid some money hurt him?" I asked the same thing. My friend Ben found this awesome article on Haitian trafficking that really sent a shock of reality through my bones. There had been talk around campus about these little beggars, and one individual stated that "bigger boys" often take the money from the boys and physically abuse them. It is a way of trafficking that absolutely disgusts me. To think that these little boys, that are just hungry and want some food, are forced to ask for money so that the bigger boys can take it from them makes my heart break. So what can I do? Our friend circle had a conversation and the solution is not simple. If you give them money, they bigger boys will take it and abuse them. If you don't give them money, the bigger boys will abuse them for not having anything. We talked about buying them food and drinks whenever we can. That seems like the best solution, but the trafficking needs to be stopped. Only God has the perfect solution, but it still breaks my heart to know that these kids live a live of tragedy.

Every time I leave the walls of the compound where I live and teach, I can only pray that God would heal them. I may not be able to change the world, but my God can.

I hope you'll read the article. I found it super interesting.

Lets Talk About Sex

Ninjas, or something

It all started with this passage from The Hiding Place:

"It was that the solemn mother-daughter talk promised over the years for this night, the entire sex education which out taciturn society provided, was now not possible."

BUT MISS!!! Are you telling us that girls didn't get the sex talk until the night before they were married?!

Why yes, yes that is what I'm saying. My tenth grade class sat there, stunned.

Miss, I got that talk in the fourth grade.

This remark turned in to an hour long discussion on sex, dating, marriage, and relationships. And I didn't stop it. They were so engaged and interested in what I thought and what the Bible said about these topics. It was truly one of the best conversations we have had. Even though it wasn't on topic of the book, it was an encouraging conversation to have with these girls.

"Miss, why did you decide to wait?"

My class has known for a while that I was saving myself for marriage. I wear my "true love waits" ring every day, so they had asked me what it meant and I simply said that I was waiting until I got married to have sex. I was glad when this question came up because it gave me a chance to tell my story.

I don't recall ever getting "the sex talk" from my parents. I do remember getting it at school. "Sex is bad!" What an inaccurate way of explaining sex! That statement molded my view of sex from that point on. Not only did I want nothing to do with it, but I was TERRIFIED of it. No one ever told me how much of a gift from God it was. It was much later in life that I finally realized that sex is NOT bad. Outside of marriage, it is a sin and there are consequences, but inside of a God ordained marriage, it is a blessing! Even today, I have to wrap my brain around that. I have to put aside the thought that sex is bad, and remember that it is such a wonderful thing IF it is inside a marriage.

I wanted to pour truth into these girls, and I could see that so many of them had questions on the topic. I had them write questions down, and one girl said she had no idea that sex outside of marriage was a sin. I was thanking God that at least one girl heard the truth.

Then it moved to dating. I really don't like to talk about dating often because I have been so scarred by it. They wanted to know everything I thought about the topic, so I was asking God to give me the words to say to these girls. They knew a little bit about my past with boys, but they were asking in depth questions.

But Miss, I REALLY like him, but he is a player. My response: RUN. Don't even think twice about it because you'll probably end up getting hurt.

What if your parents don't want you to date? Obey. The Bible children, obey your parents. Chances are, they know what is best for you, and know that dating in the tenth grade often leads to heartbreak.

What if he asks you to sneak out to see him? Oh no. Don't do it! If he wants you to break your parents trust, then he is not worth your time.

We started talking about qualities that we liked in a guy. They were rattling off "nice eyes" and "great smile." I was giggling, and all of the sudden they said "MISS! What the the top five qualities that you won't compromise in a guy?" That question is often so difficult for me because I tend to be extremely picky when it comes to guys I date. But I tried, and here is what came out.

1. Man of God who loves God more than he will ever love me and strives for a relationship to grow in Christ.
2. A servant who always wants to help the people we are surrounded with and others around the world.
3. Attractive, because you just can't have a relationship if you aren't attracted to the person.
4. Adventurous and always wants to explore and find new things to do.
5. Intelligent, but not overly intelligent to where I feel stupid.

They giggled at some, but understood every single one of the things I was saying. We talked about building your relationship on the foundation of Christ, because without Him in the relationship, it is doomed. Relationships are incredible difficult, but 10 times harder if Christ is not the center of it.

I may never know if anything I said affected a single person, but God was definitely working in several of their hearts. I had them write down the things they learned and the questions they still had. I know God is stirring in their hearts and I'm excited to see where they go from here.

I know that I don't have many answers when it comes to dating and marriage and sex, but God spoke through me and allowed me to communicate His truths. After that class period, I was looking back at the people I chose to date in my past. I wish I would've listened to my own advice in college.

These girls mean so much to me, and I was so excited that I got to share a little piece of how God healed my heart with them.

My wonderful tenth grade class