A Whole Month

It's been almost an entire month since my last blog, but since life is calming down, I will have more time to blog. This month has been ridiculously crazy. With school and work, I have barely had time to breathe. This month has really showed me God's grace, and has been helping me grow more in Him. I wish I could remember all the things that have happened this month, but I definitely know I can't remember all of it.

I had finals, which went very well. As soon as my last final was over, I went straight into mini-term. Probably the worst idea I ever had. It was a three week public relations case study analysis class. I had class every day from 9-12, then worked 12-6, then usually went to the library to work with my group from 6-10, and by the time I got home I would be exhausted and go straight to bed. So needless to say, the only people I had interaction with were my group members.

Even though mini-term was terrible, something did come out of it. I didn't have a place to live, or people to live with, and neither did one of my group members, so I will soon be a resident of the Woodlands with my group member Tabatha. I think this will be better than the situation I am in now because we don't really hang out with the same people, so we won't have to worry. Plus, we have a lot of similar views and habits, so it should be good. I think I am most excited that I will have my own bedroom AND bathroom!

What else happened?

Oh yes. The bad part of the month. I had some really heartbreaking issues this month. I had my heart broken by someone I thought cared about me, my friend Addison almost bit the dust, and my friend Austin was murdered. Not such a fun month.

Through getting my heart broken, I have learned that I cannot just give my heart to anyone. I have to make sure that the person is right for me. I get so tangled up in words, and I don't ever step back and think about the consequences. And boy were these big. I found out a lot of new information that made me thankful that I didn't get too involved with that person. I know that God has the perfect person out there for me, and I'm excited for Him to reveal that in His time, not mine. For now, I'm not going to worry about it.

Addison is one of my dearest friends from high school. I found out that he was in the hospital and was having a lot of issues. He had a lot of pain and some swelling. All very scary things. Since then, he is doing better. The doctors still have no idea what happened to him and probably never will, but I'm just glad he is doing better.

I was sitting in class one day and logged on to utsports.com, and the lead story was about Ramar Smith. All of this is normal, he used to play UT basketball before he got kicked off for drugs and grades. The reason there was a story on him was because he robbed a boy named Kinder at his apartment complex. Ramar turned himself in but was out on bail after an hour.

Thats Ramar up there. I don't really like him much right now, and here's why. The day after he robbery, a man was shot at the Woodlands apartment complex. I was reading the story in class, and the boys name was Charles Corn. I was very interested because I knew a boy named Charles Austin Corn, so I facebooked it, and sure enough, it was Austin. Austin and I went to high school together, and I was friends with his sister. He used to tease me when I was in middle school, but was always nice to me once I was older.

It's been rough ever since. He was in critical condition, and I thought he would be ok, but he died last Sunday. I know Austin made some bad decisions, but I pray that he knew what was right and that he was following the Lord. I know his family is in the utmost pain, so I would really appreciate if everyone would pray for him.

I also got to see my dad perform this month. I went to Cherokee, North Carolina which is pretty close to Knoxville. My friend Amanda went with me and we had a great time. It was a whole lot of fun, and my parents invited us to go to Dollywood with the bus driver's family on Memorial Day. So we went and had an amazing time. I couldn't ask for a better day in the park.

That's pretty much all the exciting events that have happened in May. I'm leaving Knoxville on Monday and going to Florida on Tuesday. I'll definitely blog more while I'm down there!

Peace out ya'll!

It's Been A While

It has been quite some time since my last post. As much as I hate to say it, I really shouldn't be blogging right now. I SHOULD be studying for my exams on Monday and Tuesday. My mind is kind of in a whirl though. So much has been going on in my life, and I haven't even had time to just be still and reflect back on what has been going on. I'll do my best to explain all the wonderful and not so wonderful happenings of my life.

First was the Orange and White game, which would have been a whole lot of fun except for the fact that before we went into the game, I found out that a dear friend of mine was in the hospital. It is really hard for me to deal with things of that nature because I have dealt with so much death in my life. I automatically assumed the worst and assumed that Addison would soon be gone. After many deep breaths and talking to my mom, she calmed me down and told me to just breathe, and not worry because he is still alive. The next few days were filled with phone calls trying to let everyone know what happened, even though I had little information. All I knew was that his eye had swollen to the size of a golf ball, he lost vision, and that eye was also bleeding. He had massive stomach cramps and high fevers daily. He also had a bump on his temple (which made me the most nervous). Kara had told me that 4 specialists had been in to see him and none of them had ever seen anything like this before. That also scared me. I just wanted to know what was wrong with him and I wanted someone to tell me that he was going to be alright, because from that information it sounded like he was going to die at any minute. As far as I know Addison is still in the hospital. I'm going to talk to Kara this afternoon and see if she knows anything more.

Of course when I found this out, I automatically went into my little hole and didn't talk to hang out with anyone. I ended up going home last weekend because I wanted to visit him in the hospital, but he wasn't accepting any visitors.

Also, my silly car decided that she wanted to break. Thankfully, she is fixed, and the beast that I am driving right now will soon be returned to my mother. It's been kinda funny rolling in the Escalade though. I have turned many heads, but not because of what I look like, but because of what I drive. I think it shows a shallowness in some people.

The other thing that I have been really working on is my relationship with Christ. I have been so disobedient, and I finally feel like I am back on track with my life. Of course, it's not perfect, but I feel much more confident in myself as a person and my relationship with Christ. I've been hanging out with Jessie and Kaitlin more, and that has really inspired me to lead a better life. I also realized that Super Summer is coming up soon and it's my responsibility to be prepared for that, so I am getting back to where I need to be, and I'm so excited!

School is almost over for this year. Before I know it I will be a Senior in college. That is absolutely crazy for me! I began to ponder yesterday about the day that will soon be coming: the day I walk across the stage to get my diploma. It's one year away. I will have my public relations degree in hand. How crazy! I hope that I'm ready to be thrown into the real world by that point. I know that the economy is in terrible shape right now, but hopefully by the time I graduate there will be more opportunities for me to get a job.

Well, if I'm going to get that diploma I should probably start studying. It's been real.

>K

Life is fun.

I've had such a good two weeks. Although they have been filled with minor ups and downs, overall its just been amazing. Today I am so excited because my brother-in-laws parents are coming through Knoxville and they are taking me to dinner. They should actually be here at any minute. I can't wait!

My week was absolutely crazy! Monday was just a normal day. Work, school. ya know, all that jazz. Tuesday I had school all day then I had a mixer with my sorority, which was so fun! The theme was risky business so I wore an over sized oxford and some shorts and of course the aviators! It was a lot of fun though. I met a lot of cool people and had fun hanging out with my sisters.

Wednesday was a fun day too. I worked and had school, but we also had a game that night which was great. We won! That is always exciting. It was a really good game, and I got to sit next to Gus again which is always a treat!

Thursday was Bluegrass at Mellow Mushroom which was fun too. I played trivia with Josh vs. Nick so it was a lot of fun beating Nick pretty much every time. I left a little earlier than normal because I was so exhausted, but overall it was a good night.

Friday, Bethany, Jessie and I went to Mellow Mushroom and hung out for a little while, then I went to Lauren's toga party. It was pretty interesting. I didn't really want to wear a toga, so I just went in my normal clothes. Then we went over to someone's apartment and played Rock Band for like 30 minutes. It was fun too. I'm really really terrible at it.

Saturday I went to a B.A.C. party which is where you dress up as anything that starts with a B or A or C. I was a beach bum. Grace ended up spilling punch ALL over me, but it was still fun. I was super exhausted that night so I didn't stay long and ended up going home and staying up until about 3 texting. Never a good idea for me to sleep text.

Sunday I decided that I was going to take it easy, so I stayed home for most of the day then made cupcakes with Jessie and watched the fantasy factory. It was quite relaxing. I was definitely going to go to bed early and sleep a good nights sleep, which was so exciting, but again with the texting. I think I might be addicted HA!

I am really looking forward to this week. It should be pretty relaxing. I don't really have anything going on so I'm going to relax and catch up on homework and just enjoy these nice days that we are supposedly about to have!

This one's for you Mo.

Every time I step foot into my church in Nashville, one of the first things I hear is this loud person screaming "Birkhead!!!!" It puts a huge smile on my face and I automatically know that Moses is the one yelling my name running to me with open arms waiting for a hug. I've been up at college all semester and haven't gone home since Christmas break. Today I found out that Moses was in the hospital and wasn't doing so well.

He and his brother Gene were in a terrible car accident either Wednesday or Thursday and Gene turned out with a dislocated thumb and a few bruises. Moses was not so lucky. His left side is pretty beat up including a collapsed lung, 12 broken ribs, a bruised spleen and kidney and lots of scratches. He is on a ventilator and they are worried about infection. He is doing alright for the moment, but if he gets an infection, things could get a lot worse.

I think that I feel so bad about this and so scared for him because he is only 16. He is way too young to have to experience anything like this and I know that I should go visit him. If only school wasn't a problem and work too. I know he needs love, and I miss getting to see him and hear my name being called. I don't want him to lose his joy and his great personality after such a traumatic event.

I also feel so guilty because I was looking at Facebook and I saw someone's status being about Moses and Gene being in a wreck, but I didn't think anything of it and went on with my day. I was too concerned with what I was going through and with what I was freaking out about to even have two minutes to say a prayer for two boys that I care very much about.

I realized that my problems are so small compared to what other people are going through. Moses is in so much pain, and my little bit of confusion is at the forefront of my mind. What does this say about me that I can't even take two seconds to think about my friends. My priorities are definitely needing a change, and it's definitely something that I will be working on.

How great is our God!

So lately I've been so caught up in school and work that I haven't really taken the time to just sit and think. I beat myself up so often because I know I am not giving God all of me, and it frustrates me to think that I am not. I went to church last night and we all got on our knees and just reflected on how big God is. It was exactly what I needed to refocus my heart. It was so great!

So, we definitely have a game tonight against LSU, and I'm so excited. Hopefully we can pull it out and win! I don't know why I get so excited for basketball. It's just something fun to do.

So Bethany and I decided it would be a good idea to crash diet for three days, and I didn't quite make it, but I did lose 5 pounds! That excited me greatly! I cheated a bit today, but nothing too horrible. I was just starving and I won't go home until like 10 p.m. I'm pretty much living off of unsweet tea and black coffee. It's all good though!

I just got a big wave of sleepiness. It's 2:30 and I work until 5, and the game is at 8. Boo. I keep daydreaming about Mexico. I want to go back so bad! It breaks my heart to think that I am here enjoying life, and these small kids in Mexico are starving and poverty stricken. I do admire them though. They have more joy than I can even express. I strive to be as joyful in the Lord as they are. I am going to work on that this week. I'm going to be more joyful and more loving. No more bad moods for me! Hopefully I will keep it up!

I should probably get back to doing my job. Baha!

Kristina

My first blog!

This is kind of exciting. I was sitting at work reading a blog about Africa when I decided I wanted to start my own blog. Mine will not be as intriguing as hers, but it's a start. Who knows when something will happen that is worthy of actually writing about.

I named my blog captivated because I am often captivated by many different things. I hope to share some of my passions, my happenings and other things that happen to captivate me. I'm excited to share everything, and hopefully this will be a good way to express what is going on in my life.

Currently, I am work, which is where I spend the majority of my time these days. It is a good job, but it tends to be boring sometimes, like today. We don't have anything happening at the Arena this week, so it should be pretty chill. We do have two basketball games this week, LSU and Florida. Those should be pretty good games, and hopefully we can pull them out. Memphis was a fun game, sad, but fun. Bethany and I went and it was great, except for the whole losing thing. Everyone was really intense and really into the game, so there was a lot of spirit everywhere, even for the Memphis team.

After the game, Bethany and I went to Copper Cellar and ended up eating with some people she had met the week before. It was a little awkward at first, but it ended up being really fun. I ended up talking with this girl named Sarah who graduated from UT in Public Relations (which is my major) and she asked me if I had an internship, and I haven't so she told me to send her an e-mail and she would be happy to work with me! I was so excited about that, and it is with the Knoxville Tourism and Sports Corporation, which would be perfect for me! Hopefully that will work out.

It was a pretty good weekend though. Jessie, Bethany and I went house shopping on Sunday and found one we really liked, but we are going to continue looking until we are certain that is what we want to do. I'm excited about living with them. I'm sure there will never be a dull moment.

Speaking of dull moments, last night, Jessie and I watched Pride and Prejudice (the 6 hour movie) and it was such a good movie! Granted it was long, but I really enjoyed it. Jessie and I were being completely retarded last night and pretending like we lived in their time, but that didn't last long. It's so weird to think about living in that time. It's so different from today, and sometimes I think it would be cool to have lived back then, but I sure do love technology.

Anywho, God has really been challenging me this week. For some reason I have been slacking like crazy and being so apathetic towards everything. I have such a passion for Him, and such a joy from Him, so why am I being stubborn and not following the way I know I should be? I am praying for a soft heart so that He may speak to me. I really feel like I need to get away and just be alone with Him. I know that can't happen right this moment because of school and work, but soon enough I know that I will be able to be alone with Him and completely refocus my heart.

I'm so excited about this blog, but I should probably get back to work and do my job.

Love always,

Kristina